In the previous text, I wrote that you must become a different person to achieve your goals. You must become a person for whom your goals come naturally.
Becoming someone else isn't easy. For most people, aging is the only transformation in their lives.
How to become a different person?
A person is a sum of their habits. If you want to become someone else, you must build new habits or stops the habits holding you back.
Hundreds of people wrote countless texts about habit-building. All their ideas come down to one thing: doing something repeatedly for a long enough time.
We must trust the process because the process works. Always.
I can prove it to you quite easily.
Have you ever seen a person who destroyed their life because of a drinking problem? How did it happen? Do you think they decided one day to become an alcoholic? No. They have never done it. Yet, by their dedication to the process and forming a new habit, they managed to ruin themselves.
If we can destroy ourselves by learning a harmful habit, we can make a positive change in our lives in the same way.
Let's assume I want to learn a new language. How should I do it? Should I spend 8 hours learning once a month? Will I learn anything? Not a chance.
I have to make a small step every day. For example, I can spend 10 minutes learning every morning. Ten minutes isn't much. It is so short you can't say you don't have time to do it.
So you will find a different excuse. You will say it is so short it doesn't matter.
If you said it, you would be wrong and right simultaneously. Of course, the 10 minutes I spent learning today didn't matter. It wouldn't make any difference if I didn't do it. However, sticking to a small habit makes a wonder over a long time.
Trust the process.
Trust the process and give yourself prizes for every small achievement. Suppose you decided to learn French 10 minutes a day. Give yourself a prize after learning every day for a month. You get bonus points if it is somehow related to your goal or will motivate you to continue learning. Going to a French restaurant may be a good idea, especially if it inspires you to learn more. Don't you want to go to such a restaurant in France and order the food speaking in French?
Be careful choosing the prices. If you exercise every day to lose weight, buying a cake to celebrate a month of daily exercise may not be the best choice. On the other hand, buying a small piece of a tasty cake won't destroy your effort and can be a pleasant celebration of your achievement.
How to build a new habit?
There are only three steps. Easy steps. So easy you won't believe it is enough. Seriously. There is no magic pill or any secret wisdom—just three steps.
- Decide what you want to achieve.
- Split the goal into small steps that you can do every day (or as often as required).
- Do them every day (or whenever you need them).
You don't need anything else. Yet, you will probably fail anyway. You will fail because you think, "this can't be so easy. There must be a secret method."
There is a secret method: believe in a simple process. Most people won't because "it can't be so easy." If you trust the process, you will prove them wrong.